Journey...

I walk down that lane,
I look back...
There is wind which blows,
dust that sprawls across the whole narrow lane...
The trees ghostly white,
the buildings speak of a ghastly past...
I walk down that lane,
my scarf is torn,
my shoes are worn out...
I see that skies fill again with the clouds,
which cry down their tears,
I yearn to look back,
see the way I came from..
Probably walk a few steps back...
But no,
alas! it won't be so,
ah woe betide,
things have changed...
A change I saw not,
a whisper I heard not,
a pain I felt not...

Now after that anguish,
after that pain,
all that is left is these silent ways,
lonely,
dusty with the dirt rising from those unburied coffins...

Now all that is left is a torn scarf,
a battered bonnet and a tearless mask...
The blood is dried, red and black as the rust from that shell,
the lidless eyes ever awake,
the tired arms carrying the baggage,
the bruised legs walking on,
the ache numbed by the morphine and pain...

There lies darkness ahead,
there was darkness behind...
Or is it just me,who is blind?

Now I wonder,through these chasms restrained,
now I wonder as I walk on that lane,
I wonder with doubt,
whether man was just meant to keep walking,
and forget,all else which was beyond his stride...

This moment,I still walk on,
on the land that is dead,
and amidst the trees that have been slain...

This moment,I wonder in this dying mind that was once sane,
whether all that was worth
was just the journey I made...

© Karthik Adithya Singaraju

On hope...

Its a part of life that one tends to ignore the difficult concept of acceptance of inevitability...
The frail human soul tries its best to ignore due to sad unacceptability,the inevitable truths.It yearns to believe in that prospect,that utopian euphoria that only hope can dare to explain...
Sometimes,not so rarely,have I witnessed situations,circumstances where the weak human is faced with that deep feeling inside,which keeps nagging at the back of our head telling us the impossibility of what we hope,but still we,the dreamers keep ignoring that warning till it hits us across our face. And when it hits us,we say nothing,there is just a single tear across our pallor,which but says one thing,"see? I told you."
Yes,that tear is the language of the truest and most sensible being that resides in the deepest realms of our heart,that tear is the hand of that being,which writes on the walls of our hearts,the warning,the message,the instruction,the inevitable truth,which we choose to ignore till the last.
It may not be logical,as someone rightly suggests,to ignore the writing on the wall,but yes, still we do it...
People say its our weakness,which makes us do it,people say it is the reason for our doom,the reason for all that went wrong in case of humanity.
But I just feel happy,feel innately calm,peaceful,when I see that whatever happened,had a just reason.
If it were not for our weakness,I perceive,where would we have found our strengths,where would we have learnt about our mistakes,where would that lesson have come in our textbooks. If it were not for our weaknesses,where would education exist;for what is education,but an analysis of our mistakes...
It is best visible in our study of our fathers,which we call as History... I see the ultimate aim of history in its relevance to us,to you,to me,to your brothers,to your sisters,to every human... History is but a study of past glories,and the mistakes and lessons that lay embedded in that past glories of our fathers...
What knowledge would one have of the pain of war,the worth of faith,the worth of sacrifice,the beauty inherent in love,what knowledge of joy,what knowledge of happiness would one possess,if he had never known the past...
How could one understand the romantic beauty of happiness,joy,calm serenity,had he not known pain...
Somewhere we try to avoid the pain,somewhere we like to run away from it...I see no harm in doing so,after all,it hurts...
But it is also true that ultimately you have to face it,and it is also self-implied that it is for your own good...
The hope that keeps us alive,the hope that keeps us moving on in our sycophantic life,the hope that guides us to do mistakes,the hope that guides us to accept them,and it is again hope that makes us learn from those mistakes and keep moving,I must say,as long as we have faith in that hope,it is again the hope itself that will give us strength to endure and experience,whatever life has to offer to us,beautiful or else,beautiful... Yes,the other aspect is also beautiful,for I perceive that pain has a beauty so inherent in its worth,that even everything happy may not possess,and a true student of humanity must see beauty so vibrantly emanating from even pain,as he/she sees in joy and happiness,and only then,can one learn the true worth of life...
It is impossible indeed to imagine life without hope,for what meaning would life hold in the absence of hope,and the faith that hope generates to keep us rolling,while the wheels on the buzz go round and round...:)

© Karthik Adithya Singaraju

But this day I know...

It maybe that one day,life may end,
it maybe that I will never again learn to smile...
But this day I know...
I might have lost,I have truly lost,
while I glowed with the satisfaction of winning...

But this day I know...
I have been mean,yes,I said you can not...
I have been,yes,I said you will not...
I have doubted,I have been skeptic,
but now I know...

But this day I know...
I have shut out my heart to everything that was good,
I remained blind to all that meant...
But this day I know...

It maybe that I lost some things forever,
it maybe that I will regain some things again...
But this day I know...

I boasted my ignorance,
I gloated my arrogance...
But this day I know...

I have learnt to smile my friend...
I have learnt to smile...
That day I smirked,that day I rolled my eyes...
But this day I know...

Once I ignored,once I over-looked...
Once I judged...
But this day I know...

I sit here, in this lonely chair, my heart is troubled,
I doubt if I must, but I smile...
I am scared, trust me I am...
But for a reason I don't know,I go ahead and smile...
If these tears speak to me of that loss, that smile tells me the gain...
I know I fell,I know now I needed to...
I have learned what I ought to have seen long ago...
But this day I know...

I know now,you can smile...
You have won my friend...
You have won that old game...
This day content,I know where I must lie down low...
I rest in the lap of time...
But this day I know...
That all I had to do was choose between yesterday and tomorrow...

This day I do know,
I am content and peace sleeps beside me in this solitude,
unlike hours in darkness that I spent in past,
so lonely with pain in that blanket of snow...

© Karthik Adithya Singaraju

Gifts...

The ice on the glowing palm,
the snow on the fiery hearth,silent...
You see in those eyes so deep,
a serene calm, brought by the thunderstorms...
Now the waves are gone,deep into the sea...
Now the clouds have gone high above the mortal's sky...
Lord is asleep in his Mistress' arms,
and Vagabond in shadow of the date palm...
Ye restless mortal unto sea,
Ye ruthless pirate drunk again,
Ye heartless dagger of the Mark...
Now see the shadow of the dark...
The shadow crept inside Yer heart,
those voices silent, ring a chord,
and Ye see that mermaid swim the sea,
Ye see that Triton strike Ye free...
Now oh! ruthless pirate long forgone,
now friend so dear, Ye sure have come;
This is the gift, Winter gives to thee,
the soft ice rests for the softer breath of Ye...
This is the Gift, God has gifted Ye,
snow dwells in thy fiery heart,
calm as a bumbling bee...
- Anyo Shiyen
15/04/2010

© Karthik Adithya Singaraju

Meeting of Ladies...

As the waters in sparkling eve,
As the winds blowing in the the darkling scene...
Now I see the beauty,as it rests;
words left behind in the hallway,
sounds forlorn in the alley beneath this nest,
all the words, lost in thoughts,
all the thoughts, lost in feelings,
feelings stop with this tender breath...
August rain falls,
pearls from that lady wearing the pale blue dress...
Now this boy,at the foot of that church rests,
listens, intent, to that flute blowing abreast...
The drops waken, the lively green dress,
and perfume, scent of the elegant lady,
wearing that green-brown dress...
The young lad, lies down, with his head resting,
on the bosom of his mother,
and floats amidst the stream of dreams, unrest...
The young ladies greet,
and the merry lad sings, the songs with that merry zest...
Oh! pray, Lord!, gratitude,
musing, my Lord!, thee blessed me with this sight...
Now let me close my eyes,
and let me relive this sight...
Adieu...
Anyo Shiyen
6/4/2010

© Karthik Adithya Singaraju

An attempt in Romanticism...

You seem to me like a distant star,
You seem to me like a stream afar...
You glisten in darkness yet so fine...
Thy face lit,by the moonlight,
shadows those planets nine...
Thy grace,a feline yearns,
thy laughter, beg fairies abroad...
Thy scent blooms to the envy of the
sweetest roses of all...
Hear O! Merry lad,the Lady comes,
covered with heavenly snow on her hem...
Hear O! Ladies,at the country inn...
Her clamour of happy feet,
singing beyond thy din...
Hear O! Father at the Holy Altar,
the Lady comes...
Hear O! Master,
thy daughter runs in the wild...
Untamed and free,
sings songs divine...
Ahoy! Beholder,here she comes...
Walks softly the steps of my door,
on this eve of fall...
Here,she arrives,
I shalt need to tend to her needs...
Daughter of Nature,
here she doth greets,
in mellow fairy voice,and honey-like words,
asks my health and sweet pleasantries...
Pardon my Reader,here I take thy leave,
for the Lady is here,and the candles lit...
Now I shalt go,and in her company try to fit...
-Anyo Shiyen
22/03/10

© Karthik Adithya Singaraju

Musings in Solitude...

Those painted shadows walked that moor,
those haunted humans in that dark contour...
I walk this distance,
I shed these tears,
I sigh my despondence onto this night...
It felt so noble,
it felt so true,
and I,unwisely, upon my darkening truth,
sighed again, of content, and, for love..
And I, unwise, shook my girth,
and I, unwise, cried out my pain...
Now I realise, now I know the untrue,
and now I, unwise, accept that truth...
The dead poet sung, that grave old song,
that brave heart said, the ballad wasn't wrong...
And I sit, amused, listening to the folklore,
amused, aye, not at the ballad but at my naivety...
Now I sit, abstruse in my solitude,
now I linger, I durate for the rest of my time here...
Alas! these tears, like the dew from the moon,
these tears fall from the pallor,
and vanish soon...
Now at this dusk, amidst dark slumbering pain,
in this lonely corner,
I see a storm raging, in vain...
Yet Ye know, my friend,
I am trying to let this pass,
I am searching for the rain,
I am looking for the sunlight,
which shall dissolve these tainted shadows of fear...
I wait for the moment,
when I shall cease to be haunted again...
All I say, all I sing,
all my musings, point towards that ray, that light,
and while waiting for this fear to vanish,
to be vanquished...
I pen down my name,
while waiting, in solitude, this is but my game...
This, is but not all the same,
it feels, and rightly so, not very insane,
it feels right, it feels good,
to feel my heart again...

© Karthik Adithya Singaraju